My Autistic Son and his Brother

I have an autistic son who just turned 4 years old and he is the love of my life. Well, I have three loves of my life including my husband, my 4 year old, and my 1 year old. There are challenges to raising a child with Autism, but you learn that your love is strong and you want to protect him more from the chaos of life.

When my Autistic son was about three years old, I found out I was pregnant with my second child. It was like my first born knew that his brother was being added to our family because he was so upset at me. He would touch my stomach and have tantrums. He would push me in my stomach and be so angry at me. Although he is non-verbal, his behavior towards me changed significantly. There was so much anger towards me from my 3 year old, it made me so sad.

However, 13 months later, with the addition to our family, my Autistic son and his brother have a love-hate relationship, and it is the most hilarious thing that I have ever seen.

My Autistic son has a problem with sharing, and the baby is trying to explore his environment. Just imagine seeing a 4 year old and a 13 month old have a disagreement, and get into a physical altercation. The 13 month old baby is getting physically aggressive with my Autistic son, who is a gentle giant and rarely responds with aggression. Sometimes they have their moments when I have to intervene, but then there are times when I allow them to settle their own problems.

Recently, the four year old, who has some deficits in social norms, and his role as a big brother, has been trying to keep the 13 month old safe from…everything, since 1 year olds are little terrorists who are desperate to  discover their environment. My Autistic son grabs his hand and tries to lead him to better and safer surroundings, but 1 year olds are all about learning new things and getting into trouble.

It’s safe to say that the 1 year old doesn’t give a fly shyt about being safe and is up for creating as much chaos around our home as possible, but my four year old, who has his own struggles, tries to grab his brother’s hand and lead him back to mommy and daddy… well mostly daddy.

Gosh, these kiddos worry me with their personal interactions, but sometimes you must sit back and allow them to develop their own type of relationship.

Although our baby has Autism, we treat him like any child who doesn’t have any developmental issues. We allow him to explore his relationship with his brother, and it has been a little hectic at times. But he is learning that his baby brother is a hot mess, curious, and energetic. It is so hilarious because me and the hubby ensure that our two boys are interacting with each other normally in order to build a bond between the two, but sometimes the 13 month old wants to bite and hit his older brother, who runs to me crying because he won’t dare hurt his baby brother.

I love these babies!


Secondary Trauma

I’m tired today!

I try to keep myself in check, cuz I know that the things that come out of my mouth may offend or confuse many. Life is just so complicated that at the end of the day, drinking a single glass of wine is the only outlet that allows me to decompress…once the babies are soundly asleep in their beds of course.

There is so much happening in our country, in our world. In the US, there is so much racial tension, and throughout the world, innocent people are being murdered by terrorists. I have such a heavy heart today. I’m thinking about all those people murdered by a single evil psychopath. Adults and children taken from this world so abruptly, it causes people thousands of miles away to become so exhausted with the struggle of life on this planet.

We weep for the lost souls, but then we have to deal with our own realities. Suffering secondary trauma in your day to day life isn’t so much fun. When you have a career that interacts with the public in certain circumstances, you sometimes lose faith in humanity. You get a front row seat to the lives of individuals who live outside the norm, and you are stuck with making life changing decisions that affect those who you barely know.

Oh well! So much exposure to secondary trauma, so much exposure to the politics occurring in our country, and you almost train your brain not to care anymore. As the world becomes more violent, you learn to adapt to the madness. You learn to adapt to  the frequent loss of human beings that you don’t know personally, and you try to live in a world where violence against our fellow humans is the norm.

I’m tired today! But maybe tomorrow is a better day!


Donald Trump vs. Ruth Bader Gingsburg

Ruth Bader Gingsburg doesn’t like Donald Trump as the republican candidate.

I understand that chief justice, Ruth Bader Gingsburg, is an older woman set in her ways, but she was the culprit in starting this firestorm of political drama this week. I guess frustrated with the state of the presidential campaign, Gingsburg criticized the Donald in a way that of course prompted a major tantrum from the #whineylittlebitch.

Gingsburg went so far as to say, “He is a faker. He has no consistency about him. He says whatever comes into his head at the moment. He really has an ego. … How has he gotten away with not turning over his tax returns? The press seems to be very gentle with him on that.”

Ruth Bader Gingsburg

Oh snap! She called him out #BIGLY!

In usual Trump fashion, Donald behaved like a #whineylittlebitch, acting as if the woman hurt his orange little feelings.

U.S. Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump speaks during a campaign stop in Tampa, Florida

Trump responded by stating, “For someone on the Supreme Court who is going to be calling balls and strikes in the future based upon whatever the next president and Congress does, that strikes me as inherently biased and out of the realm.

Trump has also questioned her sanity and has requested her resignation from the bench…all laughable as millions of people across our great nation think Donald Trump is suffering some form of dementia or mental illness.

At the end to day, its safe to say that the Chief Justice doesn’t give a flying fck about how people respond to her comments. Her appointment as chief justice is a lifetime appointment. No wonder why she could care less about offending anyone, especially Donald Trump.

Still Voting for Hillary?

Hillary lied! She lied to the American people about her damn email server. Hillary assured America that she did not send confidential or top secret emails through her private server. FBI’s director, James Comey, made it clear that she sent multiple emails that were “top secret”, and then went so far as to claim that she “may have” been hacked in the process of using this email server. This is damaging news to the Clinton campaign, no doubt.

Ok, here is the tea! Director Comey said “no charges are appropriate,” which also means that she is not a criminal, just someone who said “f@*k the rules, I’m a Clinton.”If she were a regular employee at a regular job, she would have been wrote up or recieved a verbal reprimand…or maybe even terminated from her position.

I believe that Hillary lied her azz off regarding the email server, and they proved this information after spending millions of tax payer dollars. Am I surprised? Hell knaw! Am I still voting for Hillary? Hell Yes!

At this point in the election process, when there are two candidates full of bull shyt, you have to choose the lesser evil. Hillary lied and politicians often tell the public lies, especially during an election cycle. But there is nothing that Hillary can do at this point to make me vote for Donald Trump. The man is an orange, stubby little character who is often whining about how the media treats him. Bill Maher described him so elegantly, calling him a #whineylittlebitch.

It seems that every speech Donald Trump blesses us with, he sounds like a raving lunatic verging on senility. Just today, he was making a speech and had to stop in the middle of the speech to acknowledge an insect flying by, and proceeded to calling the insect Hilary Clinton. Take a look and have a good laugh.


When you just don’t give a f#ck!

frankly-my-dear-i-don-t-give-a-damn-8I think there comes a time in your life where you could care less about bull shyt. The small things no longer matter and you learn to say “I don’t give a flying fck about what anyone says.” You start to let things just roll off your back and move on. I think its a significant stepping stone to get to that place where you are no longer easily offended because at the end of the day you no longer care about other people’s bull shit.People with attitudes…that’s their problem. People with complaints…that’s their problem. People got a problem with you… fck em, that’s their damn problem too. Not mine! Oh well! No significant reaction from me necessary.